LawyerLow Diaries

Some Sundays are lovely and lazy and some are action packed. Today was a little bit of both but mainly hugely emotional. We had to say our goodbyes to Grandma and make the long journey back to Durham ready for my return to work tomorrow but left something hugely important behind. Read on to learn what!
We seem to have taken the good weather down with us so hopefully we will have a decent week ahead. Wherever you are and whatever you have planned next week – make the best of it you can and always look for the opportunities life presents you with!
Right, here we go with a mixed bag for the top 5:

1. After both overindulging last night on the vino we somehow agreed we would get up early on our last morning in Scotland and go for a run. The kids were clearly listening in whilst sleeping as they got up at 5.20am and 6am respectively. We stuck to our guns however and off we trotted just after 7am. We must be mad! It was a glorious morning and super quiet on the paths and in the park, probably because no one in their right mind goes for a run that early on a Sunday morning. I particularly enjoyed Steph saying to me just before the end that going for a run is a great hangover cure. I’m not sure I agree! 🌞 
2. The best thing about leaving Grandma’s house is that we always get a cooked breakfast on the last morning. In fact that’s the only good thing about leaving. How it contrasted on this occasion with the job I was given first. Steph’s new headphones ran out of battery during the run and when she looked for the charging cable it was missing. A process of elimination left the only place it could be in the wheelie bin outside (thrown out with the original packaging). So there I was, raking through the bins early on a Sunday morning. Fortunately it was a successful rummage and I was rewarded with my bacon and eggs! 🍳 
3. We packed up the car ready to head south having agreed that E would stay behind to spend some extra time with Grandma. It was a much tougher decision than I had expected but all were in agreement. They will have so much fun together and it allows us to spend some real quality time with M as well. Steph was understandably upset about driving away whilst I was very stoic about it. That is until we got back to our house and then it sank in quite how quiet the next few days will be. M is also a little lost as his partner in crime is missing – he adores her so much so we’ll have to see how he copes. I’m also worried I’ll have nothing to put in my diary without some of her cracking one liners! 😢
4. On our way down the road we stopped in to see Grandpa in Edinburgh. M just wanted to stuff his face and do some jigsaws but we took the opportunity to use the facilities and of course changed his nappy. All was well until we headed back out to the car to leave and Steph caught a whiff of something unpleasant. Of course he’d waited to that point to fill a clean nappy. Of course there was only one clean nappy in his change bag and the rest were in the boot. Of course the bikes were strapped to the bike rack meaning we couldn’t open the boot. My boy certainly has impeccable timing. Maybe we can potty train him this week whilst E isn’t here to “help”! 💩 
5. To pass the time on the long journey in the car, and without E in the back seat, Steph asked if I was happy to listen to a podcast. That was fine with me and she hooked up her phone. Little did I realise she was going to put on “You’ll Do” which is hosted by a couple of comedians and it’s all about long term relationships and they talk openly about what it’s really like. I suppose it’s meant to be relatable. What worried me after a few minutes was I realised that she’d put on the episode about your relationship with yourself and how you can be really happy being single. I’m a tad worried she was sending me a message by picking that specific episode but she reassured me it was simply a coincidence. I guess I’ll find out soon enough! 📻

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

Pick me off the floor! Another day of glorious sunshine and it was positively hot in Aberdeen. I’ve never known anything like it. We have been so lucky to have been treated to such fabulous weather this week. 
Today was the first day we had kind of fixed plans and it meant a schedule and a bit of running about. It was worth it however as we had such a fun and happy day and the last bit of energy we all had left has definitely been expended. That’s what I thought until we got home and M managed to work out the buttons on the outside radio turning it up to full volume to pump out some beats during tea. He then kept turning it down at intervals to allow us to play musical statues. Maybe he’s wanting to be a DJ like his uncle when he grows up…
So what made the top 5 today?

1. We got ourselves up and out early this morning and went to meet friends at the park. The kids were all on great form, and of course E had to take her bike to show off her proficiency – she checked and confirmed there were no stinging nettles in the park! They decided to play a game of hide the duplo where one of them hid a piece of M’s duplo set anywhere in the grassy area. That was all fun until it was E’s turn and she just lobbed it into an unknown flower bed and of course she couldn’t remember where it was. After a lot of searching we just gave up the ghost and went back for ice cream with a flake and sprinkles. That always makes things feel a little better (coupled with the fact that our friends had an identical piece of duplo at their house which they kindly gifted so M is none the wiser!) 🙈
2. We then went to another friend’s garden for a picnic and managed to catch up with a few of my friends. The kids had a great time again and helpfully we were able to use the toilet as well – it’s a constant battle! Steph had the pleasure of taking E this time who insisted she came into the bathroom with her. That was when it started: “Who made God? What is toilet paper made of? What is paper made of?” Steph appears to have swerved the first two questions and confidently answered the third with “Paper is made from trees.” With her usual withering look E replied, “No Mammy, I know the answer is elephant poo so don’t try and trick me by saying anything else.” It’s an old lawyer trick to never ask a question you don’t know the answer to, but this just takes the biscuit. She apparently saw it on a programme once and just like the creator of the poo, she never forgets! 🐘 
3. At the picnic the dreaded swingball was brought out. Now I have a bit of an issue with this popular game, and in particular it’s very difficult to get it to “swing” properly without getting constantly twisted. When you add children into the mix you inevitably end up with a series of knots and the odd concussion. Sadly I contributed to the latter by hitting the ball a little harder than I meant to and it swung straight round and clobbered my unsuspecting daughter in the cheek. She was really brave and just gave me a good telling off. I did get to see a couple of the others playing and I’m reassured it isn’t just me that struggles with this piece of dangerous apparatus! 🎾
4. The third highlight of the picnic was definitely the games of hide and seek. There’s something about adults trying to play with the kids which is hilarious, especially when it backfires. Now there’s only a limited number of places to hide in a single back garden, and so after only a couple of games they are exhausted. Imagine my friend’s surprise when it was his turn to count and he genuinely couldn’t find E. Now he would say he was playing along and knew where she was, but the fact that he checked the shed 3 times would suggest otherwise. She was actually hiding inside and then when he was looking away we smuggled her into the shed so he found her on the 4th check there. Almost as funny was when she couldn’t find him when he was just sat on the decking with a cardigan on his head. Sometimes hiding in plain sight is the way to go! Such happy times! 😊
5. Tonight was the all important monthly bath for the kids (joke, of course!) Things were a bit tight for time as I was trying to write my weekly quiz, help feed the kids, run the bath, bath the kids and get them ready for bed before the quiz then started. I was just about on track and brought M in for his bath. After stripping him down he managed to wriggle free and hid. I mucked about pretending to look for him until I realised the front door was open and he had scurried off outside in nothing but his nappy to find his Grandma. I mean what will the neighbours say?!? Steph managed to snap a photo before we all cornered him and got him into the bathtub with the door firmly shut and locked! What a terror! 🛁

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

After the excitement of yesterday I was pretty sure Friday would end up being a bit of an anticlimax but of course I shouldn’t have been so pessimistic! We are all completely exhausted this evening after the kids’ energy levels reached a new high and we just weren’t allowed to stop. Fortunately they are both flat out asleep but the adults aren’t far behind. 
After an overcast start to the day (which began with E climbing in with me well before 7am and insisting I read her a story all about the Hairy Haggis) the weather has just gotten better and better which is lovely but not so great for my poor nose which is now peeling profusely!
A quick fire pre-weekend top 5 for you to enjoy:

1. For some unknown reason I had agreed to accompany my wife on a run first thing this morning. I think I’d convinced myself it would be a good recovery run after my 10k which I’d completed only 10 hours earlier but actually I just want to support her as she works her way through C25k. I learnt that there’s a fine balance between being supportive and encouraging, and sounding like Mr Motivator and annoying the hell out of her. It’s a balance I don’t think I got quite right, but I’ll keep trying (if she lets me come on another run with her!) 🏋️‍♀️ 
2. This morning the sporting activities continued with football, cricket and scootering high on the agenda. M derives so much joy from playing with his sister and that makes it a lot easier to teach/ coach/ supervise. He also has developed a real love this week for Grandma’s garden. He just loves wandering around looking at, smelling and then (when he thinks no one is watching) picking the flowers. He particularly loves the lavender, presumably because of the gorgeous smell. The only downside to his new passion is that he’s taken to trying to catch the many bees which hang out in the flowerbeds. It freaks E out no end when he almost catches one in his hand but I suppose it’s one of those life lessons you might have to learn the hard way! 🐝 
3. As readers from yesterday know, E had grand plans for an 8 mile bike ride this afternoon. I was a bit apprehensive but knowing how determined she is, we packed up and headed off. It was an inconspicuous start as she lost balance after 12 metres and wobbled off the pavement onto the main road but we quickly recovered and made it safely onto the railway line. I’ll be honest, she was fantastic! She worked her legs so hard and chatted away to me and we sang as we went. Lots of cyclists went past us but we overtook pedestrians too and she handled that really well. We stopped for refreshments at half way (with matching flamingo glasses!) and then turned for home. We were half way back when E decided to try and brush some of her hair out of her nose, lost control and went careering into a nettle bush. It was horrific. She was so upset and I am definitely scarred for life. The dock leaves had limited effect despite Daddy’s promises and she declared that she was never going on her bike again. But I’m delighted to report she did and we cycled back very carefully. If anyone reading this is lucky enough to speak directly to E in the near future, make sure to comment about how impressive her cycling is! You’ll make a friend for life! 🚴🏼‍♀️
4. Grandma appeared back from the shop this afternoon with surprise presents for the kids. M was delighted with his Duplo counting train and E was really chuffed with her new lego set. Now I’m a pretty big fan of lego, especially those packs with instructions given that my imagination isn’t up to much these days. The only problem is that the toy is for a E and it would be nice if she sat and built it herself. I don’t mean she shouldn’t have help but some active participation from the child would be very nice. Instead she just left me to it as she took the little characters off to play in whatever the latest fantasy world is she has created. I didn’t get it completed before bed, so the parting shot from my darling daughter was to “make sure you have my lego all finished by the morning as I want to play with it as soon as I get up!” I’m telling you know that I haven’t bothered and I’ll just have to accept the consequences tomorrow! 👷🏼‍♂️
5. Steph and I announced that we would make tea tonight as a thank you to our amazing hostess all week. After that was agreed, there was then a bit of a panic as we tried to decide what to make. We ultimately settled on a chicken dinner. Now, dinners are very fine things when cooked well regardless of whether it is a Sunday lunchtime or a Friday evening. Everything turned out pretty good even if it did take longer than planned meaning I ended up cooking chicken nuggets and chips for the kids to stop them dying of starvation (apparently a genuine risk according to my elder child!) Got to love a job done well and we are all set up for a busy weekend. Let’s be having you!!!! 🍽

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

Another very active day on holiday as the unexpected good weather continues. Today was definitely a day to feel happy to be alive. Creating amazing memories are always better when they just happen unexpectedly rather than trying to deliberately create something special. And I know I’m incredibly lucky that my wonderful kids make every day an adventure no matter what we are doing. 
I was told today by someone whose opinion I care more about than I really should, that my diaries are getting far too long so I promised I’d try to keep this one a bit shorter for him, and he might then make it to the end!!! I’ve now written it and unfortunately I appear to have failed – sorry!
Top 5 is going to be in reverse chronological order today for no particular reason:

1. I finished the day with my 9th GNR Solo Run which also doubled as my Virtual Durham 10k. Tonight I should have been pounding the streets of Durham, repeating my escapades of 12 months ago when I raced in my first mass event on the hottest day of the year and almost didn’t make it up the hill to the finish on Palace Green. Covid-19 put paid to a repeat performance but we have been able to race virtually. I decided to do this with Steve and we cracked out the old pink vests. He said he had a great route but didn’t let slip it involved running on the sand and climbing up near vertical slopes during the 7th kilometre. So whilst it was beautiful and scenic and I saw some seals it certainly wasn’t a walk in the park! I particularly enjoyed the selfie he took where he managed to balance me perfectly on his head! 🏃‍♂️ 
2. Before my run I had a lovely light tea planned for obvious reasons. Imagine my surprise therefore when we arrived home to find a BBQ bulging with meat. It was yet another gorgeous evening so it was a great shout and incredibly tasty. Of course I ended up having 2 or 3 sausages too many which in itself isn’t too bad other than too much meat gives me quite a lot of wind particularly when they are chilli sausages and when I then do exercise. You can see now why I was running behind Steve throughout! I sadly must report that this must be a genetic condition if my son’s reaction to sausages is anything to go by! 🌭 💨 
3. We popped out to visit one of E’s godfathers this afternoon and had a lovely time in the garden. He takes his role very seriously and taught some important life lessons during the visit including how to throw a tennis ball, how to pass a rugby ball, how to build an obstacle course, how to build a bird house out of jenga blocks and how to do the yoga stag pose. He certainly crammed a fair bit in! M just tried to talk to the dog and ate a few stones! 🏉 
4. Before we even came up on our little holiday E has been desperate to surprise Grandma with an afternoon tea. So today was the day and once again Daddy was left in the kitchen to make the scones whilst the kids disappeared outside to play. They were on course to be a complete disaster but a few late amendments to the recipe meant I somehow managed to salvage them and we ended up with a tasty batch of fruit and an even more tasty batch of cheese. We still had our cupcakes from yesterday and some freshly made sandwiches and we sat outside with a pot of tea and it was all very civilised. M decided that the floor was far more comfortable for eating his cake and proceeded to drop most of it. He happily just picked up all the crumbs and shoved them in his mouth. I’m pretty sure some of it was mud, especially the bit he picked off his shoe, but he seemed to find it very tasty! ☕️ 
5. The start of the day was marked by another fantastic bike ride by E. Bearing in mind she’s only just learnt, she took off for a ride along by the river and then around the park and all the way back home again. She did nearly 5 miles today and has an 8 mile route planned for tomorrow! Daddy is beginning to struggle to keep up! We had to stop at the park for an ice cream (of course!) and as usual M timed his wake up from his nap to perfection just in time to gobble down some of Mammy’s. After our afternoon tea she announced she wanted to get the bike out again to practice her starts and stops which she has also now perfected. I just love her determination to master this life skill! 🚲

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

Half way through our holiday week and we decided to have a nice chilled day today. No triathlons, no drama, just kicking back and putting out feet up. Sadly the kids didn’t appear to get the memo, especially M who joined us in bed about 10 minutes after we went to bed last night. Our bed just must be so much more comfortable! I’ve just been informed that I’m being sent to sleep with E tonight so Steph and M can have more room in our bed – tune in tomorrow to find out what time E jumps on me in the morning! 
The weather just about held out for most of the day but we did have to stay indoors later on when the rain arrived. More about that in a bit. 
Anyway, even quiet days are eventful when it comes to my family so let’s get cracking with the top 5:

1. We start tonight with breakfast. For many an important meal, but for most (especially midweek) simply a necessity which gets ticked off first thing. It’s a bit more of a challenge with my family as we seem inevitably to end up with 4 different meals and the kids continue to demand at least 3 courses. They don’t know they’re born! So this morning M had finished his waffles, then his fruit, then his bagel whilst E was taking her time with her first bagel. She suddenly yelped with pain holding her finger. She proceeded to tell us that “the bagel hurt my finger” and despite a whole series of questions I still haven’t the foggiest idea how that holy ring of bready goodness could inflict injury on a small child. I guess we’ll never know, but be careful out there boys and girls – the bagels may be rising up against us! 🥯 
2. We headed out all together for a lovely riverside walk. They was only minor drama as E tried to socially distance from every stinging nettle she could see whilst M decided to sit in the mud after trying to walk into the river from the little rocky beach we found. But we battled on and it was really quite pleasant. We then climbed up the steps and to the top of a field which was a bit of a trek so had a little seat to catch our breath and take in the view. At that point M started to head back down the field the way we had come without a backward glance. Now, as all parents will know, there comes a point when your child heads in the wrong direction where the realisation sinks in that they’re not going to stop. Sadly for me this was quite far on during his bid for freedom and I suddenly found myself sprinting down a slippery field trying to catch my 2 year old who by now had broken into a run himself. I caught him just at the top of the steps leading down to the river and you just know he would’ve gone down there given half a chance. Clearly there’s no reasoning with him so he seemed to just find the whole thing quite hilarious, as did Mammy and Grandma who helpfully took a photo of me running, which was the sum total of their contribution to the episode! 😤
3. E really wanted to bake today. So Daddy was sent to the shops with a shopping list and then rolled up his sleeves upon his return to tackle red velvet cupcakes for the first time. Now the perfect image of baking with your kids is very different from the reality in my experience. They lose interest very early on and even if you coax them back with promises of spoon/ beater/ bowl licking duties it is short lived. To be fair E did some beating and also added the egg (by smashing it against the edge of the bowl so hard it disintegrated into the mixture and I had to try and fish out the biggest bits of shell) so she ran around the kitchen shouting that she “did it” and “added the egg all by herself!” I suppose I can’t argue with either of those statements which are both technically true. The kids then disappeared off to help Grandma do some pruning so it left me to finish off, including creating an icing sugar explosion which coated the entire kitchen in a fine layer of icing sugar. It’s always better to bake in someone else’s house! Anyway, the cakes actually turned out not bad and have been wolfed down and apparently Emma wants to do scones tomorrow. I’ll get my apron back on… 🧁 
4. With the rain coming down and the cupcakes cooling on the rack, there was only one thing the kids wanted to do before tea – introduce Grandma to Frozen 2. They sat transfixed and as usual belted our their favourite songs from the soundtrack whilst Grandma tried to keep up with the storyline. I had to catch myself a couple of times as I was merrily explaining everything to her and I realised I was coming across as having an unhealthily detailed knowledge of this particular movie. Unfortunately I didn’t catch myself in time when I uttered “ahhh, this is definitely my favourite one” just as the opening bars of Lost in the Woods played. I’m hoping she puts it down to my excellent parenting skills (you know, developing an understanding of what your kids are into so you can related better) rather than anything else!! ⛄️ 
5. E came down to use the toilet this evening as the adults were having their tea. She was taking ages so I headed through to make sure she was okay. Before I knew it I found myself perched on the edge of the bath having a very detailed conversation with her about her bowel movements and how she talks to all of the objects in the bathroom so she doesn’t get lonely when having a poo. She paused for breath at this point and so I asked if I could go back to finish my tea. She stared at me incredulously and said “It’s all right Daddy. I’m sure it was an accident so I’ll forgive you. But you know it’s rude to interrupt and I hadn’t finished talking so you can just sit right there until I have. And I won’t give you into trouble because I did stop to breathe so you might have thought I’d finished but I hadn’t.” I mean who does she think she is?!? I politely reminded her that my tea was getting cold and she could very easily finish her toilet trip without me so I bade her farewell, but not before handing her back the piece of toilet roll she had given me to hold when I first walked in, just so it was ready for later on! 💩

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

17 weeks ago today I first set up from home to start the Low lockdown experience. I definitely didn’t think on that day the world would still be in this state 119 days later, nor that I would still be writing this diary. I still regularly wonder why I spend so much of my time each day writing this, but here I am yet again. I think it’s perhaps because it is a constant in my life at a time when every else seems so uncertain. 
Anyway, enough of the deep thoughts! Today’s exercise regimen hit a new level as I inadvertently completed a mixed up triathlon. All this exercise and fresh Scottish air has me exhausted – I’m even having to write my diary entry earlier just in case I zonk out on the couch.
Grandma produced more presents for the kids today including some lovely socks. E was presented with a pack of 3 Frozen socks which she immediately wanted to wear. What none of us remembered was that M is just as big a fan of the movies and so he insisted on putting the Anna ones on whilst E wore the Elsa ones. 
Another busy day meant some tough decisions on what made the top 5 but here we go:

1. For the second day in a row my wife and I have gone out for an early morning couple’s run. It still amazes me that firstly we have both decided that running is something we can do, second that we are doing it at the same time and thirdly that we would drag ourselves up and out with smiles on our faces to get in a run before breakfast. Wonders never cease! I managed to mess up my route completely, especially after my smart watch conked out this morning so I couldn’t check anything on my wrist throughout. Laps of a car park to make sure I made my 5k minimum was not the most scenic run I’ve ever done! On the other hand Steph absolutely smashed her latest C25k and felt great when she finished so definitely she takes home bragging rights today! We returned home to find that E had sat on the toy tractor outside which was soaking wet from the overnight rain and had given a rather unfortunate wet patch on her backside – it made me laugh at least! 🏃‍♂️ 
2. So what should a young family do on a cloudy July day in Aberdeen? Go to the beach of course, however a family has never been so clearly split by something as exciting and uplifting as a trip to the seaside. On the one hand we had Daddy and E who love everything about the beach, even the sand between our toes and the freezing cold sea water and on the other we had Steph and M who could think of nothing worse than getting sand between their toes or going anywhere near the sea! Fortunately Daddy and E won out today even after M’s complete breakdown on the promenade (one of the lie down and refuse to move classics). By the end there were sandcastles made and two very wet children despite repeated reminders that we didn’t have any towels or changes of clothes with us. I’m pretty sure E made it half way to Norway at one point. We had so much fun even if E had to travel home in her waterproof jacket and not a lot else! 🏖 
3. To complete our triathlon after the run and “open water swim”, we took E out this afternoon for her latest bike session. Today we focused on mastering our starts, learning hill starts and unexpectedly how to handle speed bumps. She absolutely smashed it yet again and Daddy is starting to struggle to keep up. We did had a little blip when a bus appeared (about 300m away) and distracted her so she ploughed straight into a bollard, but no harm done and we got her back on pretty quickly. The running commentary is always amusing especially as she headed towards the very same speed bump which caused such a calamity 48 hours before. She just shouted out “I can do it!” and “I am confident!” and rode over it before continuing to the next and the next. She’s so proud of herself and I suspect even the random passers by were proud of her too given how many high 5s she then got from her Daddy! 🤚
4. On the way home from the beach at lunchtime, M slipped into the land of nod and had a very impressive 3 hour nap. The rest of us had lunch and then E took down one of her reading books to do with Grandma. Now E looked tired but she battled on with quite a bit of help. I was only half paying attention but when they got to the last couple of pages, Grandma definitely seemed to be doing more of the reading. When they finished I looked over and E was flat out on the couch snoring. Perhaps Grandma should confine her stories to bedtime! Just at that moment M arrived, bright eyed and bushy tailed. Clearly it would have been too much to have them both asleep at the same time! That Scottish air has a lot to answer for! 🥱
5. E told me this afternoon, out of the blue, that she had just made a wish. Now, when I asked what it was she immediately told me that she couldn’t tell me as if she did, it wouldn’t come true. The only hint she would give was that it was white. This evening Grandma asked why she couldn’t tell us what her wish was and she was told that Daddy had told her that for wishing flowers to work, the wishes had to stay a secret. After a little bit more discussion I realised she was talking about blowing dandelion seeds. Anyway, she finally let slip that her wish was cold and began with “s”. We’re not sure whether it is snow or skiing but either way it seems unlikely to come true in the middle of summer. Maybe it’s just the fact she’s suffering from withdrawal symptoms given it’s been over 5 days since she’s watched Frozen 2!! 🤫

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

I’ll confess I’ve always had a titter when I see the Gym marked on the hotel map on holiday. I mean who wants to go to the gym when you’re on holiday? Yet here I am, on holiday, having completed a 4 mile run, more cycling and a Yoga class and it’s only Monday! How my life has changed!
Tonight everyone is already tucked up and fast asleep (except me) after another very full and busy day. So many stories to tell and smiles on faces and I don’t even know where to begin. But I need to find a top 5 and so take a deep breath and dive right in…

1. Despite the very challenging day yesterday at the Sir Chris Hoy school of cycling here in Aberdeen, we went again today. E was not so keen but reluctantly agreed to practice her starts and stops on the driveway. That did not go well and before too long she stormed inside, throwing the bike down and saying we should put it in the bin. We followed her in and found her messing on with her helmet. It turned out the Velcro was stuck to her hair so Grandma shoved a piece of kitchen roll in and that did the trick. Suddenly she changed into a different girl and went back outside and just took off. So we packed up the car and headed to the park and away she went. With the promise of an ice cream if she did a whole lap she’s definitely cracked this whole cycling malarkey. Poor Daddy had to run to keep up but it was definitely worth it to see her master this life skill. I asked how far she thought she could cycle now and apparently 180 miles is her limit. Not sure Daddy will be running all that way! 🚵‍♂️ 
2. It only took a very short period of time of M watching his big sister before he decided that he’d quite like to ride a bike too. So he jumped on his new balance bike and took to it like a duck to water. He’s so proud of himself running up and down. There’s definitely something about the second child and the amount they learn from the first born. I just wish I could choose which bits he picks up from E and which bits I can re-teach (we don’t always get things right the first time!) Apparently tomorrow we’re all going out again on the bikes to hammer home everything learnt today. Got to love boot camp! 👫
3. One of the photos I took at the park today, which you can see below, saw E celebrating cycling around the entire park by herself and standing on a stone pillar. After I took the photo she started panting really heavily and I asked what she was doing. She replied that for the photo she needed to breathe in. I asked why and I’ll confess I immediately assumed she was trying to breathe in to make her tummy look smaller because she’s been talking recently about different sizes of tummies. I needn’t have been worried as the reply I got back was “Well Daddy, I breathed in because I need to stay alive.” She looked genuinely confused as to why I was questioning her life choice to breathe in and out regularly. I do worry she will think I’m a right weirdo in the years to come! 🤪
4. I scream. You scream. We all scream for ice cream! Of course we had to have ice cream at the park and even M timed his nap perfectly so he woke up just as the cones arrived. I had to run back to the car to get my face mask and then E wanted to come with me into the cafe shop negotiating all the way about how many scoops she would get. Her negotiating skills are pretty impressive! I got her down from three scoops to two but she did get a flake on top. Most of it ended up on her dress, in her hair or up her nose but boy did she enjoy it! It’s definitely my go to choice of bribe and works every time! I also get to have one too, just to make it fair you understand! 🍦 
5. This evening was the third BBQ tea in a row as we continue to make the most of this unexpectedly glorious weather. I was in charge of cooking the meat as everyone else brought out the side dishes, plates, drinks etc. Great teamwork and even the kids lent a hand. Just as the food was ready some ominous black clouds suddenly came over and as it happened I needed to pop inside at that moment. Just as I pulled the door behind me the heavens opened and it rained. I mean it really rained. Torrential downpour! My poor family were stranded under the open gazebo and I couldn’t do anything. Well, I could have I suppose but I would’ve got very wet so I just had to wave from inside the house until the rain stopped and then I went to survey the damage. It wasn’t my fault Steph was wearing slippers or that everything was soaked. Fortunately I managed to capture a photo showed the slightly wet weather! ☔️

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

Sunburn? I didn’t drive to the frozen north to get sunburn! The weather forecast was completely wrong and we ended up with the most gloriously sunny day here (not the promised cloud with light showers…) I didn’t feel that optimistic about the day when M tapped me (read, slapped me) at 3.15am this morning and wanted to climb in our bed. He insisted on then sleeping right on the edge so I had to hold him to make sure he didn’t fall out. Not much sleep after that sadly, although I did manage a short nap after Steph got up and inevitably she caught a photo of her two favourite sleepy boys!
The kids have just not stopped today. Anyone would think they forgot we are on holiday! You know it must have been manic when they didn’t ask to watch any screens all day. It was far too nice to be watching rubbish on TV anyway and instead we filled our lungs with some good Scottish air. It has done them the power of good as they both zonked out tonight as soon as their heads hit the pillows. 
Daddy was kept incredibly busy but somehow managed to keep a note of a top 5:

1. I had decided in my wisdom to pile the bikes onto the back of the car yesterday so was determined to make sure we used them whilst we’re up here. With that in mind Grandma and Daddy decided to take E out this morning to get her back up to speed after her precious riding success. In a moment of inspiration Grandma suggested we head into a nearby (large) car park so E could show off her skills. What I hadn’t appreciated was that the main entrance road was also on a downhill slope and also had a series of speed bumps. And off E flew. And she hit the first bump. And she lost control. And there we had our first proper bike crash. To her credit she got back on but for the rest of the ride she cried constantly and when told she just needed to be confident she rode around wailing that she wasn’t feeling confident. Boy that was a long ride! We are determined to get her out tomorrow and we’ll have a good look for her confidence! 🚲 
2. The one thing E has been telling us all week is that she wanted to take her purple kite up with her to fly in the garden. Of course Daddy forgot in the packing panic and so when she asked for it today, there was a lengthy silence. Fortunately I was heading to the toy shop today (compulsory mask in hand) to pick up M’s new Paw Patrol balance bike and managed to pick up a kite when I was there. Oh she was overjoyed! Grandma took to charging down the garden to get it airborne and E spent an awfully long time running around trying to get it to do loop the loops! Kite flying isn’t something we do every day, let’s be honest, and I really enjoyed spending that time with her even when I accidentally sent it into a dive bomb right into her. 🪁 
3. The kids found great joy in digging out some of Daddy’s old toys that Grandma has kept hidden away in the garage for the last 30 odd years. I’m sure other parents have done that too! They particularly enjoyed the cars, wooden clock and a cupcake game which apparently was mine. I have no recollection! I had hoped they would want to play with my toy garage (you know the Fisher Price one that I think everyone my generation had!) but it wasn’t to be. I am also a tad concerned about what else Grandma might have hidden in the loft. I’ve already been reprimanded by E today for “being naughty” and when I asked why, apparently I accidentally threw away a rug when I was 17 and doing a tip run for my mum. These Grandma/E chats will need to be brought to a quick end. 🚨
4. For E’s third breakfast today she had a bacon sandwich. We were eating el fresco and it was all very civilised. She then piped up “Where does bacon come from?” Of course we all said “from pigs” and that just made her laugh. “Don’t be silly. Where does it come from really?” I’m not sure I need to say anything else on this one – we settled on “the butcher” as an acceptable answer and we’ll just move on…. 🥓 
5. His big sister continues to try and teach M lots of words and he got in lots of practice today. He understands absolutely everything we say but does get frustrated if we don’t understand some of his garbled language. He is trying really hard but sometimes things just come out wrong. He even gave me the finger today as you will see from the photograph below! Whilst he has mastered the word “no” he hasn’t been so successful with “yes”. For some reason it comes out sounding like “DIE”. When he gets excited and wants something we are offering him, he’s taken to running around with a big grin shouting “DIE, DIE, DIE!!!” Perhaps lockdown is a good thing so he doesn’t petrify unsuspecting members of the public! 😵

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

Well there is big news today! For the first time since the start of this diary we have a change of scenery as we took the plunge and headed north to take advantage of the relaxation of lockdown rules in Scotland. We packed the car and drove for most of the day, and are now safely and happily ensconced in my mum’s house in Aberdeen.
Whilst the emotional reuniting of Grandma with her grandkids was a definite highlight of the day and in itself made the long journey worthwhile, the change of backdrop has already done us all the power of good (and we’ve only been here a few hours!)
It’s been a long day so I’m doing a quick post tonight and am focussing on the 5 things I learnt today:

1. Don’t bother packing anything for a holiday. Anything I pack gets very quickly unpacked by my wife as she is the only one who knows how to pack properly in our house. Apparently. This is then repeated when I take the bags out to the car and put them in the boot. As soon as my back is turned, everything has been taken out and repacked “properly”. I don’t know why I get bothered about it as I should just leave her to it! At some point tomorrow I’m sure I’ll find out what my wardrobe will be for the next few days! 🧳 
2. My kids are pigs. Now during lockdown none of our family have been remotely bothered about the loss of fast food. That’s surprised me a little as the kids like a McDonald’s the same as the next kid but it just hasn’t been mentioned at any point. Even when the drive throughs opened again we haven’t contemplated going. But today, with the long drive, the easiest stop for lunch was the old faithful at Berwick. The kids were delighted with their Happy Meals but M decided to channel his inner pig by burying his face into the box to try and gobble his chips without any assistance from his hands. Perhaps I’ve been eating chips the wrong way for my whole life! 🍟 
3. I think I should invest in some family singing lessons. Long car journeys are never going to be brilliant from start to finish and keeping the kids entertained is always the biggest challenge. We did pretty well today I think although some screen time came in very handy. After finishing their lunch both darlings dropped off for a nap but before too long they were wide away and in need of engagement. Steph decided to put on some Disney songs and they happily listened to that for a bit. They both love to sing along, particularly to the Frozen 2 soundtrack. I must be on holiday as I suddenly found myself singing along too yet we all seemed to hit slightly different notes at the climax of each song. The result was some pretty ear shattering harmonies which does not bode well for our trip back home. Maybe some professional help is in order! 🎤 
4. Assuming tired kids will go to sleep is a dangerous game. The kids were overjoyed with their little gifts from Grandma and used their new plates and cups at the BBQ tea. It must be the Scottish meat because they just ate and ate and ate. No meat in the chocolate desserts but they still finished those off as well. That appears to give them lots of energy as they have charged round like headless chickens including giving each other tractor rides. I mistakenly then thought that a bedtime routine would see them tucked up and snoring away in double quick time. They have been in 3 different beds, either together or apart, and have been down to bug us at least 8 times so far. E is hungry and thirsty and needs the toilet. M just wants to play or do anything that doesn’t involve sleeping. E, to her credit, did try to read him a story and sing him a lullaby but that just got him determined to spend more time with her. I tell you now, they had better have a long lie tomorrow! 😴
5. Saturday night and I like the way you quiz! As has become the norm, I had back to back quizzes tonight (whilst trying to ignore the kids). The swimming club quiz had to be mainly written during the drive north but we did have time to come up with some pretty random topics such as balls and Disney sequels. The family quiz that followed was just a lot of fun with the usual heated discussions whilst we tried to agree on our team answer. I jest, of course, and we’ve done so many quizzes now over the last 15 weeks that we’ve already heard every single possible quiz question ever written! 🤓

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

Friday, Friday, Friday. Nothing wrong with a Friday! Even random and sporadic heavy rainstorms couldn’t dampen our spirits today! For those who read yesterday’s entry, you’ll be relieved to know that E burst into our room this morning with her book and after asking if it was morning yet, then asked for her story from last night. That girl forgets nothing! An incredibly busy day of #RemoteWorking for Mammy and Daddy but somehow the kids also managed to squeeze in a lot. They are both always full of busy and I’ve realised that whenever I try to speak to one of them, I’m always being told they are too busy. What does a 5yr old and a 2yr old have to do that is so important anyway? I suppose it is a matter of perspective and to them, the end of an episode of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse is a top priority.
I know you’ll want to know what made the top 5, so here we go…

1. An early morning start, not caused by the kids, but by a sudden realisation I’ve done very little running this week. So I dragged myself out to pound the pavements for a few miles and tick off run number 6 of my GNR Solo challenge. I definitely learnt an important lesson today – if setting out first thing, make sure you still look in a mirror before you go. According to my supportive wife my hair looks like an old man’s but my face doesn’t. Talk about a backhanded compliment! I’m reliably informed that the barbers are open again now but I fear even the most talented will recognise a lost cause when they see it! 😔
2. E found my running medals today (all 3 of them, so not exactly an extensive collection!) I was working at the time but she insisted on a presentation ceremony. The first medal was presented to me for being the “Best Daddy in the World”. I also won the second medal, this time for “Kindest Daddy in the World”. After much crossing of fingers and toes it was finally announced I had completed my hat trick and won the third for being “Best Cuddler in the World”. So much pomp and ceremony for such nonsense but I wouldn’t change it for anything. I’m not convinced the client I had on speakerphone was quite as impressed but he did seem to understand that juggling home life and work is challenging at the moment. I’m never taking these medals off!! 🥇 
3. Regular readers will have noted that our back toilet has not featured in my diary for a while. Well, it’s back. And boy is it back with a bang! It started this morning when E shouted through to say she’d found one of her baby bottles in the toilet. She fished it out and brought it through to our room (oh the joy!) It was absolutely clear who the culprit was as he just stood there with a sparkle in his eye and a smirk on his face enjoying the scene unfolding before him. Later on in the day, Steph shouted down asking if I knew where her blue highlighter was. As soon as she asked we both clicked at the same time that there was an obvious place to look. Sure enough there was the blue highlighter floating in the toilet bowl. It does occur to me that there may be a significant number of our possessions which have been lost down there. 🚽 
4. You may recall that E made some fish for her schoolmates a while ago. She has formed a bit of an attachment to them and so far has refused to actually send them to anyone! Today’s little project was to create an underwater scene to allow her fish to feel at home. She took to the task like a duck to water (sorry!) and soon had painted a rainbow shark, an octopus and jellyfish, a frog and some tadpoles and a rock pool scene. M couldn’t wait to get involved and inevitably lined up the fish in a row! This was clearly exhausting work as before too long I found E tucking M in for his afternoon nap and kissing him off to sleep. They do sometimes remind me of an old married couple, but E definitely wears the trousers! Perhaps we will be able to find new homes for those fish at some point before September. 🐟 
5. With all the excitement and busyness in the house, accidents will always happen. E appeared upstairs with a cold compress she had fashioned herself, clamped to her forehead. She took it off to reveal a big red mark where apparently she had collided with a trolley. Whilst clearly we checked her over and she is fine, I was pretty impressed with her independence just to sort out her own first aid. I was a little concerned when she turned up for bed tonight with a second cold compress on her elbow. She’d also brought a jug of water to keep in her bedroom in case she needed to use it overnight. Suffice to say I slipped that out after her bedtime story as water and her bed is a not a good mix! Parenting aim for the weekend is to avoid needing any more cold compresses! 🤕

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

•